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Cyprian Is Nyakundi


Muhoho “Mo” Kenyatta: We Hereby Give You Kenya’s “Unofficial” President In All His Glory & Splendour

CAPTION: Though he pretends to act low-key, everyone in Government knows that Muhoho Kenyatta (right) runs Kenya because Uhuru is a perennial drunk, as evidenced by his post-SCOK ruling outbursts.

One of the most interesting Facebook posts these last few days was by Robert Alai, where he intimated the existence of “Kikuyu privilege” a cliché borrowed from Peggy Mcintosh and her view of “White privilege”.

Alai’s gripe was occasioned by his arbitrary arrest and detention for over 24 hours on the day he was to travel upcountry for the funeral of the late IEBC Director of ICT – Chris Msando. His crime was posting pictures of Kenya’s first family and undisputed royalty –The Kenyattas – in tears over the demise of a family member, in this case, mother-in-law to President Uhuru Kenyatta’s younger brother – Muhoho Kenyatta.

In the week before and on National TV, renowned intellectual David Ndii, speaking with NTVs Larry Madowo had proclaimed that the marriage of tribes in Kenya had failed phenomenally and it was time for a divorce. His specific remedy was for the secession of a section of Kenyans to their own recognized enclave where they would have a right of self-determination and inclusion.

In the US, due to the terrible civil war that had seen certain states wish to opt out of the Union, Secession is a treasonable act. When the Russian Federation broke apart after the collapse of the Berlin Wall and Communism, the independence of particular states was bitterly fought.

The framers of the Kenyan Constitution had never envisaged a situation would ever arise that Kenyans would wish to be physically torn away from each other. Thus, the issue of secession as a crime had never been considered. However, Ndii caused enough commotion on Social media and news networks to warrant such attention.

It was these comparisons that Alai alluded to in his FB post that for posting pictures of the ‘Royals’ in a state of vulnerability, he (a dyed-in-the-wool and newly converted supporter of the Jubilee coalition) would be arrested and detained while a Kikuyu rubble-rouser and darling of the opposition could be allowed to get away with proposing seismic shifts in the political order, would not even be acknowledged.

This is where Robert Alai got it wrong! There is no such thing as “Kikuyu Privilege”, there is only, Privilege!

David Ndii is a part of the larger Gatabaki family which has had long ties with the Kenyattas, his niece Natasha is married to Solicitor-General and former PA to President Uhuru – Njee Muturi! Whilst he is undoubtedly a pain-in-the-arse to the Jubilee, he is endured as a mild irritant.

David Ndii is treated in much the same way as John Githongo, whose father had establishment links all the way since the independence. Joe Githongo had established the first African owned audit firm – Githongo and Co. (domiciled at Electricity House) and the majority of the first African business people and tenderpreneurs in the Mzee Jomo Government (including Kenyatta himself) were his clients.

CAPTION: Former anti-corruption czar John Githongo.

That was the reason why when he unearthed Anglo-Leasing before escaping to England, most of the old geezers interviewed at the time expressed disappointment in him, they argued that as a child of privilege, he should have known better or understood how the monies to fund his expensive schooling and lifestyle had come upon.

That is the nature of privilege and what those sick old men were trying to communicate to the rest of us.

These men and their children couldn’t give a flying fuck about secession, those are the problems of the Hoi Polloi and if it came to that, the underprivileged young men of Kenya can always be used as cannon fodder in a war of attrition to stop the secession.

To set Robert Alai straight, his arrest and detention had absolutely nothing to do with his being Luo rather he had just had a nasty encounter with Muhoho Kenyatta. The treatment would have been the same for a Kikuyu, a Miji Kenda or a Kalenjin.

The burly Muhoho Kenyatta is the 3rd born child of H.E. Mama Ngina Kenyatta and sole brother to President Uhuru Kenyatta. He is known to be the custodian of the Kenyatta family business and interests, extremely low-key and protective of his immediate family.

An innocuous story in the dailies on Friday 11th August 2017 about the impending end of tallying and announcement of the Presidential result carried a paragraph about the disquiet at the main tallying center of Bomas of Kenya, not for any reason other than the presence of Muhoho Kenyatta in the VIP section.

Mo, as he is known to friends, is a man feared by both friend and foe for his forthright manner. Certainly a man not to be trifled with, he has often been touted as the President Kenya will never have, but so desperately needs.

He approaches the World with the confidence of a man who understands that the wealth he inherited, is liberating to him and his family, alot like a lottery ticket that keeps winning. A graduate of Williams College in Massachusetts USA, he returned to Kenya to join elder brother Uhuru in building an empire from the raw material in terms of Land and cash holdings left behind by his father and more accumulated by his mother.

Unlike the Ndegwa brothers who are the other empire builders in Kenya, the Kenyattas have struggled to achieve what they have today despite the massive head-start in terms of resources. Insiders intimate to us that this has been caused by massive nepotism and racism driven by ‘Mo’ in the running of the family group of companies.

Recently, during the campaigns and specifically with regards to the Presidential debate, Jubilee party Secretary-General Raphael Tuju expressed shock that Kanja Waruru, an executive of Mediamax Ltd had confirmed to the Media Owners Association that Uhuru Kenyatta would be a participant.

CAPTION: The cock-eyed Kanja Waruru. He has suffered tremendously, all in the name of kissing Muhoho’s buttocks, in exchange for his loyalty and a salary. 

Kanja is a long-serving and long-suffering employee of the Kenyatta’s for decades, having begun in the family owned insurance firm before moving to STV once the Kenyatta family acquired it from Hilary Ng’weno when it was initially domiciled on the top floor of NSSF Building. He is a brother of the more illustrious and celebrated Wachira Waruru, CEO at Royal Media Services and proprietor of Chaka Ranch. Both are children of the late former fiery Nyeri politician Waruru Kanja.

Mo, started Brookside Dairy on the side as a personal venture, a credit to his tenacity he ran it as CEO for over 2 decades, where he made every single decision before being convinced to allow it to be managed by others, to create more time for a more important venture- that of helping his brother manage the Country.

Even then, he would not head hunt or have an open process for recruitment of a professional CEO, he handed the reins over to another long-serving friend and employee –John Gethi – a son of former GSU commandant during the Kenyatta administration Ben Gethi, who was also adversely mentioned in relation to the 1975 kidnap, torture and death of fiery politician J.M. Kariuki.

The Gethi’s own the Ksh. 3 billion Rosslyn Riviera Mall off Limuru road on what was a coffee farm owned by their late father.

CAPTION: John Gethi whose father murdered JM Kariuki is the CEO of Brookside, in line with Muhoho’s mantra of elevating familiarity at the expense of merit. 

Even Polycarp Igathes’ choice for Deputy Governor was not accidental, despite his own pedigree and corporate experience, the Kenyattas had to sign off on his candidature which was greatly aided by his wife Catherine Igathe who also happens to be the CEO of the Kenyattas insurance flagship – AIG Kenya.

All these examples illustrate the thinking of the Kenyatta family and especially Muhoho Kenyatta. He thinks along the lines of strict control and trusts only those he has had a long association with, especially from his father’s days at the helm.

Brookside Dairy would have attained global status like Italian multinational Parmalat or French Giant Danone (which has acquired a major stake in Brookside) if a simple professional management been put in place. For sure, Brookside enjoyed a massive monopoly with the collapse and recurrent problems at KCC. It can even be argued that the decision to impose the very old Nyeri spent cartridge Matu Wamae as Chairman of KCC was meant to neuter any resurgence and allow Brookside operating space. Any other competitors were bought out like Buzeki, Tuzo, Delamere, and Sameer.

If you look at Kenya as a business enterprise, would you allow people with the mindset of the Kenyattas at its helm? Wouldn’t they stunt its growth through this irresponsible reasoning and control? Have they not done so?

Close family and friends intimate to this writer that Mo has always been more concerned with people following his instructions to the letter.

Conversely, the Ndegwa’s have always placed professionalism ahead of blind loyalty and sycophancy and despite starting with much fewer resources, have surmounted the odds to build for themselves a veritable empire.

Didn’t the Kenyatta Government head-hunt James Macharia from NIC Bank (owned by the Ndegwas) to be CS in Ministry of Health?

Mo’s single biggest weakness is the racial preference and latitude given to “Mzungu” and “Muhindi” over Africans.

A story is told of an older Mzungu employed as the herd manager for the Kenyattas substantial cattle herd in the expansive Gicheha Farms, a herd that became the foundation for Brookside Dairy. This gentleman, eccentric, would drive around in a well-kept, old green jeep Jalopy whose most interesting feature was a manual fan on the dashboard, which he would turn on during the super-hot days.

On One occasion, against common sense and the advice of a Kenyan veterinary officer, this gentleman either neglected or forgot to follow a prescription for the herd and in the end, a large number of the cows died. Under ordinary circumstances, this was ground for sacking, however, Mo admonished him and he continued with his duties.

His co-workers believed that it been them in his place, Mo would have physically assaulted them (as he was  to do in those days) and ejected them from the premises!

More recently, we have stumbled on the case of Thika United Football team which has sponsored by Brookside Dairy for over 15 years but which now lies at the bottom of the Kenyan league table.

Early in the year, it was reported that Thika United would be relegated to a lower league for failing to meet some strict guidelines imposed by FIFA. It became known that the Chairman of the club by the name Elio Lolli and his officials had filed fake contracts of players in order to pilfer the sponsorship monies.

Worse, in cahoots with a Marketing manager at Brookside Dairy, these monies were split among them together with sponsorship from Supersport.

In those 15 years, the team has never won the league title despite being constantly supported and for the 3rd season in a row, appears to be playing relegation football.

However, the worst insult to Kenyans and especially those who support the Kenyatta’s politically is the strategic plan adopted by Mo towards the turn of the millennium.

For some inexplicable reason, he decided to hire 12 CPAs to become financial controllers in the group companies. An advertisement was placed in international journals by one of the Big 5 audit firms seeking suitably qualified candidates.

The instructions appear to have been very explicit, Mo wished to have only Indian CPAs shortlisted and this is exactly what happened. Twelve (12) Indians were recruited straight from India, work permits acquired, accommodation and transport arranged and they settled down to work in Kenya.

It would be heart-warming to say how disastrous this experiment was if it was not a tragedy of Shakespearean proportions. Within a year, the majority of these Indians had left their work stations and gone into other ventures, by the end of 3 years, all were gone!

Uhuru, Mo, Mama Ngina and the rest don’t believe in project Kenya. They bypassed 12 brilliant CPAs right here in Kenya and went all the way to India seeking equally qualified and talented people.

There you have it, ladies and gentlemen, the reason why Kenyans (including very many Kikuyus) have decided they are tired of the two-faced nature of the Kenyatta family. They quietly loot the economy to build the mega Northlands housing estate for their great grandchildren while our own kids survive on one meal a day.

The nepotism that has seen critical positions go to family and cronies who are less than qualified. From Justin Muturi (Speaker NA), Njee Muturi (Solicitor-General) the ever stoned David Murathe, Professional PA Jomo Gecaga, his sister Nana Gecaga (CEO KICC). The two sisters Kristina Pratt and Nyokabi who were allowed to loot the Ministry of Health via the fake containers and build dilapidated houses for our police officers respectively yet expect them to put their lives on the line?

Are these the people who were expected to scheme on behalf of Jubilee? NASA has been having a field day running rings around these intellectual dwarves, whose double tragedy was that they were too busy robbing the country, to see what was unfolding.

This is the dubious hallmark of the Kenyatta Presidency, mind control over the gullible Kikuyu population who haplessly sing praises in the misguided notion that the Kenyatta’s love them back the same way.

CAPTION: Kristina Wambui Pratt Kenyatta. Despite her mother being behind the largest known poaching syndicate in the history of mankind, she was running fundraisers for her children to study abroad. 

Sample this, in the late 90s, elder sister Kristina Wambui had to conduct a fundraiser at Sagret Hotel to raise money to send her 2 kids to the US to study. We hear that Uhuru had the temerity to send 50k, much to the chagrin of the sister. Simultaneously, the same lady had to be bailed out by the brothers to save her house in Lavington which was set for auction by HFCK. Even among themselves, there is massive inequality, a curse from taking other peoples property. These are the people who robbed Kenya’s future blind through poaching and predatory land acquisition.

Who are these people to tell us that we should not secede to allow them to govern themselves how they want?

When Uhuru Kenyatta was interviewed by the gorgeous duo of Lulu Hassan and Kanze Dena at State House earlier this year, they asked him which EPL team he supported. He was categorical that since he became President, he didn’t have such a luxury –in fact he supported Harambee Stars.

Ironically, a football team funded by his family business has been robbed so badly, that it is not a reflection of him or how seriously he takes sport as a means of impacting the lives of young people. Remember, he is the President who comes from a backyard where young men drink themselves silly out of frustration.

No, let us part ways with these people now, let us allow the Big man to crawl into a bottle where he appears most comfortable, he has enough money to do so anyway!

Would you like to get published on this Popular Blog? You can now email Cyprian Nyakundi any breaking news, Exposes, story ideas, human interest articles or interesting videos on: [email protected] Videos and pictures can be sent to +254 710 280 973 on WhatsApp, Signal and Telegram.



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